First visits with potential donors are awkward.

You're meeting a stranger.

They're meeting you.

This can lead to all kinds of nervousness...

...and that voice in your head telling you you need to sound smart, be likeable, say all the right things AND ask for money...

This month, in Fundraisers' Monthly, we're talking all about the Discovery Visit:

• Phrases to help turn the conversation to money
• The best questions to ask in discovery meetings
• Tips to make your best case for your org
• Keys to being your best in every conversation

How can you show up to your next discovery visit calm and confident?

Here are the 4 keys to being your best in every conversation:

1. Be Authentic. - Be You. This sounds obvious and easy, but it isn't. I've walked into the offices of plenty of super-successful CEO's, lawyers, hedge fund managers, museum curators and filmmakers feeling inadequate. That voice in my head told me I wasn't smart enough or successful enough to be talking to those people.

But...

Happy Friday, Generous Changers!

This week flew by for us - as in, holy moly, where can I buy some more hours?! Hope it was a good one for you.

Coming up next in Fundraisers' Monthly is the discovery visit - how to have the conversation, what to (and not to) ask and how to turn the convo to money, even and especially when it feels super awkward.

So, we're in deep thought about great conversation....

Quote we're digging: 

"Be interested, not interesting." 

Dale Carnegie said that first - and it's fantastic advice for fundraisers...and every single person who wants to be a great conversationalist!

We're watching: the super brilliant Dan Pink on the ABC's of Persuasion. 

• Attunement: Can you attune yourself to someone else, understand their perspective?
• Buoyancy: How to you remain afloat in an ocean of rejection? Fundraisers know all about this! Turns out questioning your abilities is more effective than pumping yourself up. 
• Clarity: There's a ton of information...

Retention.

It's a big hairy issue in fundraising - one that's made up of a ton of other big hairy issues: time, money, engagement, productivity, training, management and culture.

Why should you care?

If you lead a nonprofit - money & time (and time is money!).

• According to research by Penelope Burk, it costs a minimum of $127,650 to replace a fundraiser.
• The average tenure of a front-line fundraiser is 2 years, but it takes at least 10 to 12 months for fundraisers to feel up to speed in a new role.

If you're a manager - you have the power!

• 50% of employees who quit cite their manager as the reason.
• Managers account for 70% of the variance in employee engagement. (No surprise: Engaged employees are happier and more productive.)
• In short, great management makes all the difference,
• But, nonprofits provide little to no training for fundraising managers.

If you're a fundraiser - you want to succeed.

• You're driven by meaning & mission.
• You get little to no training....

Happy Friday, Generous Changers!

We're just back from CASE VI, where we got all jazzed up about our work and yours. Advancement peeps are awesome! Thank you, thank you for all you do!

Quote we're digging: 

"People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care."                                                                           - Theodore Roosevelt (and others!)

We're inspired by: Martin Leifeld, Vice Chancellor for Advancement at the University of Missouri, St Louis. Martin has spent a career truly seeking to lift others up. He sees advancement work as "ennobling souls...bringing wonderful people into life as philanthropists." When we asked the secret to good management, he started with authenticity ("let people know who you are") and trust ("you have to fully...

Happy Friday, Generous Changers!

A few thoughts as you finish up your work week...

Quote we're digging: Seems we're all struggling with work/life balance these days. Here's a nice little reminder:

"Time is the coin of your life. You spend it. Do not allow others to spend it for you."                                                                                         - Carl Sandberg

Tricky, but transformative, to remember that you own your time and only you can give it away. We may or may not be great at this, but we're working on it!

We're wowed by: water.org's collaboration with Stella Artois. Buy a specially designed Stella chalice on Amazon for $13, and Stella makes a donation that provides clean water for someone in the developing world for five...

Millie's got work-life balance all figured out.

When she's working, she's all business.

Her best business skills:

Listening - Millie hears everything (especially "walk" and "go get your leash"). She's got great eye contact and reads body language like nobody's business (like all great fundraisers).

Energy - Millie works harder than anyone I know. She runs for miles, hikes, takes long bike rides, chews bones, chases squirrels (and rabbits and opossums and birds), fetches tennis balls, & destroys stuffed animals. And, even after a hard day's work, if you asked her to take a run at midnight, she'd be ready and waiting by the door. She also looks great on camera...

Drive - Millie never does anything half-way. She's all-in. She's got killer focus and ambition.

For all of her amazing work habits, Millie still knows how to relax.

Like, really relax...

Hard work deserves guilt-free relaxation.

As a new fundraiser, work-life balance was one of the hardest things for me.

I...

Happy Friday, Generous Changers!

We're about to add a new video, "63 Ways to Thank Your Donor," to Fundraisers' Monthly.

Which got us thinking that we'd like to thank you.

THANK YOU AMAZING CHANGEMAKERS!!. We appreciate you so much.

So we thought we'd begin to celebrate Fridays by sharing a few things that make us happy-dance every week. (We're shamelessly ripping off Tim Ferriss's Five Bullet Friday here, which, btw, we highly recommend.)

Here's what we're celebrating, pondering, fascinated by this week.

We're celebrating the late Maya Angelou's gorgeous quote: 

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

Making people - donors, colleagues, friends, strangers - feel terrific is a pretty great goal every single day!

We're admiring  Pencils of Promise's outstanding tag-line:

250 MILLION KIDS CAN'T READ THIS | Let's change that

Any doubt about their mission? Try to get that brief,...

Do you feel like you have to fill every single silence in a donor conversation? 

Do you end up saying weird things, like:

“Woo, it sure is sunny outside. This weather, right?!” or
“Whew, I sure have had a lot of coffee today. Do you like coffee? I really like coffee. A little too much actually. Is it hot in here?”

I’ve used the restroom in the middle of a few donor visits just to talk to myself in the mirror:

“Calm down, crazy. You’re scaring the nice person.”

When you talk to a stranger, there are always awkward moments.

A donor once told me that the person who came to visit him a few years ago was really great, but I seemed nervous.

Which, um, made me nervous!

If you have these moments, try a few things that have helped me (almost) get over it:

• 80/20 - Listen 80% of the time. Talk 20%. If you’re an extrovert this will be tough, but for my fellow introverts, this can lift the glorious burden of talking and put the emphasis...

I see you.

Not in a creepy way - but in a great way - like:

I know you.

You're my people.

This is how a donor wants to feel when they get a thank you from you.

How do I know?

I asked a real donor - Kathleen - an amazing, generous woman who gives a lot to a lot of unique causes.

She told me what keeps her giving and what doesn't.

What works:

• Personal Stories - Kathleen's gifts are emotional and from the heart. She's motivated by individual, micro-level stories about a person (or an animal) who needs help.
• Heartfelt Thanks - Handwritten notes from staff with just a quick word about how and when her gift was or will be used makes all the difference to Kathleen. She believes even big organizations can do this well, if "they write something that feels like they know you - like they see you."

• A Real Difference - After she gives, Kathleen wants to feel confident that the organization will use her gift for the purpose they said they would. She doesn't get bogged down in the details or...

Why do most donors say they've stopped giving to an organization?

They weren't thanked. In multiple studies, from 20% to over 70% of donors say they were never thanked.

We suspect many actually were (most of us send acknowledgement letters or emails) - but the thanks wasn't meaningful or memorable.

How can you be sure your donors feel thanked?

This month, in Fundraisers' Monthly, Nancy and I walk through how to thank your donors so powerfully, they'll want to give again & again, more & more.

Stewardship may seem like someone else's job, but the very best fundraisers know great thanks is the first step toward the next gift.

In fact, great thanks is the 1st through the 7th step toward the next gift.

In his book, Mega Gifts, Jerald Panas states the "Rule of Seven" - thank a donor 7 times before asking again.

Why spend so much time thanking donors?

• Your best donors are your best donors. The people who already give to you are more likely to give to you. In one study, donors who...